Bittersweet Christmas

This has been a wonderful Christmas. We started out yesterday at a beautiful church service, then went to MIL's for dinner and presents. This morning the boys slept in, and then we had fun opening presents and eating, eating all day long. MIL came back for dinner, and we feasted on filet, butternut squash soup, asparagus, and parmesan artichoke risotto. Oh, and chocolate mousse brownie cake for dessert. Friends came by on their walk mid-afternoon and carolled us, we stayed in pajamas all day, and the boys played with almost everything they'd been given (above is One's book swag). All in all it was a beautiful, peaceful Christmas.

Except for this:


My baby Oscar has had his last Christmas. In fact, he's had his last full day. The past week has been very bad for him - he's slipping away very quickly - and before he gets into pain and suffers more humiliation we're taking him to the vet. Tomorrow. I want him to go so badly -he needs to go -but I am so selfish in my pain. I want to have him forever. I can't bear the thought that next week when I come home from work he won't be in his "comfy place" close to the front door waiting for me.

I'll write something more about him tomorrow. Tonight I'm going to snuggle up with him as much as I can, whisper in his ear, and enjoy my puppy one last time.