Me to Two tonight: "Here's your iPad back. I borrowed it to play Scrabble while you were at taekwondo."
Two: "You love Scrabble!"
Me: "Yup, I love Scrabble, especially when you let me borrow your iPad."
Two: "Don't you think it's time the two of you got married, since you love each other so much?"
I'd love to know: when exactly did my eight year old become a supporter of polygamy?